Nemesis Nick’s Ride Slide Go Cornwall 2009

Nemesis Nick · Nemesis Nick’s Ride Slide Go Cornwall 2009

Nemesis Nick’s Ride Slide Go Cornwall 2009

Date: Sunday 27 September to Thursday 1 October
Venues: Carn Brea Leisure Centre (Redruth), Cornwall’s Crealy Great Adventure Park, DairyLand Farm World, The Flambards Experience (Helston), Oasis Fun Pool (Newquay)
Who Went: Just me

Rationale For Trip
From 2002 to 2007 I went for my annual holiday to Cornwall early July. Last year I went there early June. Each included at least one visit to Flambards and, since 2005, at least one visit to Cornwall’s Crealy. This year I’d done my 3-night Devon Dash Friday 5 to Monday 8 June, and 4-night York holiday Thursday 2 to Monday 6 July around the RCCGB Summer Bash on Saturday 4 July, but still wanted a short break to Cornwall. This time I deliberately chose the end of September, travelling down Sunday 27 September morning and returning home Thursday 1 October evening, in order to span my birthday, Wednesday 30 September. My plan was to visit a different venue with water slides, rides and/or adventure play areas, and go on at least one slide of some type (water, dry tube, Astra, drop) every day.

Day One - Sunday 27 September

Journey to Cornwall
I caught the 9:40 Penzance train from Bath Spa to Redruth. The journey was pleasant and relaxing, I enjoyed the scenery en route. Just after 12:20 the train crossed the Tamar Bridge from Plymouth to Saltash, the gateway to Cornwall. For me (not sure why), crossing this bridge isn’t like going between two English counties, e.g. Somerset into Devon, it feels more like going through the Severn Tunnel from England into Wales. This time I had an added bonus: knowing that I was 37 now, but would be 38 when returning across this bridge Thursday evening. Great that for once, I would be celebrating my birthday west of the Tamar in Cornwall, “across the pond” as I see it. Four hours after leaving Bath, and an estimated 200 miles down the track, I reached Redruth.

Carn Brea Leisure Centre
Without further ado I went to Carn Brea Leisure Centre. Its swimming pool section includes:

Main pool
A standard 25 metre swimming pool.

Flume
There is just one water slide. It exits the building and after a straight start it spirals anticlockwise downwards. Suddenly it bends to the right and you re-enter the building. It then bends to the left, spirals clockwise and lands in a roped off bit of the main pool. It’s a closed tube all the way down. No showers, sprinklers, or strobe lighting effects (they’re unnecessary gimmicks); just a long, fun slide. I slid it in the lying position. The lifeguard I asked was unsure of its length, but estimated the ride time end to end to be about 20 seconds.

I was in the pool area from approximately 2:20pm to 4:40pm, and did sliding and length swimming (breaststroke) as follows:
Sliding: 12 goes.
Length swimming in main pool: total 36 lengths (6 sets of 6 with rest in between sets).
Sliding: 12 goes.
Length swimming in main pool: total 36 lengths (6 sets of 6 with rest in between sets).
Sliding: 16 goes.

Total 40 slides on flume and 72 lengths of the main pool. Since the main pool length is 25 metres, that’s 1800 metres (more than a mile).

Sunday Evening
Having left the leisure centre around 5pm I caught a bus back to Redruth station and train to St Austell, where I was to stay four nights. Having arrived in St Austell just after 6:20pm I checked into the guest house I’d booked.

Afterwards I enjoyed a delicious Sunday Club dinner at The Rann Wartha (Wetherspoons). From the selection I chose roast pork with all the trimmings, plus a drink from the Sunday Club selection. For a little extra I added a pudding from the Sunday Club menu. A super meal, and excellent value for money. Around 9pm I was back at my guest house and relaxed the rest of the evening.

Nemesis Nick

Day Two - Monday 28 September

Monday First Thing
I woke at 7am. Since I wanted to go to Cornwall’s Crealy, which required catching a bus just after 8:30, I had an early breakfast at 8am. Breakfasts were continental by default, but you could add cooked for an additional fee. I stuck to continental each morning, as it was adequate, and easier for me to fit in with daily travel plans. The continental breakfast consisted of cereal, a glass of orange juice, a bowl of grapefruit, 6 triangles of toast and a cafetière of coffee.

Off To Crealy
Getting to Cornwall’s Crealy required three buses. Firstly the 8:33 bus from St Austell to Bodmin, then another to Padstow Tesco and finally another to Cornwall’s Crealy. Complicated! I finally reached Crealy at 10:45.

Cornwall’s Crealy Great Adventure Park
New for this year is the reception and gift shop, similar to the one at Devon’s Crealy, just beyond the ticket booths. Being a quiet day, visitors had to pay their admission in the shop.

Agility Trail
An assault course which begins with separate obstacles including cargo net and swing over chasm. Next you go up a ramp, crawl through a tube and over a bridge to the end.

Demon Drop Slide
This has two launch beams. Sit on a beam, put your hands either side of you, let yourself go, and enjoy the freefall drop. Not for the faint hearted. I fearlessly enjoyed four goes from the lower beam and four from the upper beam.

Zip Slides
Nearby are three zip slides, and I enjoyed four goes on each.

Fun Fort
A wooden play fort. Around the edge is a balcony you can walk around, and in the centre is a tower containing a ladder with blue tube slide exiting from the top. I slid the blue slide twice. Links between the balcony and centre, include stepping stumps and a cargo net. I covered all parts of this fort.

Giant Twister and Triple Tubes
These form part of a large outdoor play structure with ramps and bridges. Two spiral tube slides descend from the top of the central tower; these are called the Giant Twister tubes, one of which is blue, the other green. Both are great fun to slide, very fast, and I had two goes on each: blue, green, blue, green.

Part way up are the Triple Tubes (three straight tube slides). Viewed from the top, I slid them in the following order: left, middle, right, left, middle, right. All three were very fast.

The Beast
My first ride of the day, a drop tower ride. Opened in 2008, its circular 12-seat unit surrounds the tower. Seat 1 is for children only, seat 2 was out of action. Last year, I asked the Ranger if it’s the nearest Cornwall’s Crealy have to a white knuckle ride, and he said “It’s only pink knuckle, because being a family park all our rides have to be suitable for families”. This time I had two goes (seat 3 followed by seat 4). The seat unit went up and down a few times, unlike the Drop at Funland whereby the seat unit is pulled to the top once and released (rapid freefall drop) until you are slowed down by magnets. Tame compared to the Drop at Funland or Ice Blast at Pleasure Beach Resort Blackpool, but nonetheless great fun.

Small 4-lane Astra slide
A smaller version of the Mega Slide (described later), which young children below the minimum height for Mega Slide can go on. I went on it, one go per lane left to right. Not particularly thrilling, but worth at tick.

Lunch
I went to the Dragon Kingdom Café for my lunch, and had a Jumbo Hot Dog meal, which included fries and a choice of hot or cold drink (I chose white coffee).

Swamp Monster’s Eco Adventure
A series of bridges, like River Challenge at Devon’s Crealy. Here the Burma bridge chain dangles in the stream. I cheated by walking on the bars either side not to get my trainers wet, but I did all the other bridges properly.

Towering Inferno
Formerly Ollie Octopus, with octopus theming, it was rethemed as Towering Inferno last year. Four tube slides exit the tower at various heights. The first (lowest) one was blocked off, but the other three were usable, and I had one go on each of those.

Mega Slide
A six lane Astra slide. From the top the two left lanes are orange, middle two are green and right two are yellow. I had it to myself while I slid all six lanes, my own unexpected “exclusive slide session”. I noticed several pops of AIRtime on the orange lanes. The yellow lanes gave large bumps towards end. There is also a spiral tube slide exiting from near the top of the Astra slide. I enjoyed two goes, it was quite fast even though I was wearing jeans.

Thunder Falls Log Flume
My first ride since lunch. Your log goes up the lift, around a u-bend, and drop. After another u-bend, up another taller lift, and yet another u-bend there’s a large drop with a mighty splash! Thankfully I had my cagoule and leggings on. I had three goes (logs 5, 6 and 3).

Raging River Water Coasters
Water slides which you ride fully clothed in dinghies, like Wave Runner at Paultons. These are made by VanEgdom. From the top the right hand slide is a straight slope, the left hand one is wavy. I did two goes on each: straight, wavy, straight, wavy. I think the wavy one is more thrilling; last year I noticed a tiny bit of AIRtime on the wavy one, but not the straight one. This time I didn’t notice AIRtime on either.

Viking Warrior Pirate Ship
A typical swinging pirate ship made by Metallbau Emmeln; its end rows give the most exhilarating ride. I rode it twice (once per end row). Two goes at a time on a pirate ship is enough for me, any more would probably make me sick.

Roundabout PlayPump
A park roundabout you sit on to go round and round, identical to the one at Devon’s Crealy which I told you about back along. I rode it clockwise and anticlockwise.

The Beast
My final ride for today, this time in seat 12.

There are three other rides I didn’t go on. Pony Express (Metallbau Emmeln) is a low monorail where you ride ponies which follow the track. A bit like Steeplechase at Pleasure Beach Resort Blackpool, but this is level, tame and can be ridden by young children. I was going to have one go, but didn’t have time. Safari Train is a Dotto train which runs around the Park. It ran five times that day, but I think it runs more often in high summer. Having ridden it on previous visits, I intentionally gave it a miss this time. Water Walkerz are giant bubbles you enter and walk around on a pond, for an additional charge, so I didn’t bother with those.

Sadly there’s no roller coaster at Cornwall’s Crealy, unlike the El Pastil Loco at Devon’s Crealy. However Devon’s Crealy currently lacks water coasters and a drop tower, so the Raging River Water Coasters and The Beast at Cornwall’s Crealy make up for not it. Let’s hope they install a coaster one day, preferably wood.

Haunted Castle
An indoor adventure playground with one red drop slide, a metal tube slide, a maze (upstairs), two floors of soft play equipment and a ball pit. Adults (or should I say adult kids?) are allowed to play on everything in here. The lighting is dim and there are spooky sounds. In addition there’s a blue double drop slide (drop, flat bit, slope, ball pit landing) out the back. I began with eight goes on the double drop slide. In the spooky area I enjoyed the soft play equipment, including swing over chasm, zigzag web climber, tumble tower, spinning discs, swinging steps, swing over nets and slither chicane. Also I went through the maze upstairs, and in the ball pit downstairs. Finally I enjoyed eight goes on the red drop slide.

At this point I returned to the reception / shop to be fitted with a return wrist band, valid for unlimited returns over 7 days, i.e. 28 September to 4 October. Although I knew that with my plans for the remaining days (DairyLand Farm World Tuesday, Flambards Wednesday, Newquay and Oasis Thursday) there wouldn’t be time for me to revisit Cornwall’s Crealy, I wanted to wear a band the remainder of my holiday as (i) it would be a souvenir when I got home, and (ii) make me feel like being on a RCCGB USA trip.

Dragon Kingdom
Designed and installed by Taylor-Made Play. Another indoor adventure playground featuring:
4-lane rainbow Astra slide.
Red drop slide (straight down and out).
Blue double drop slide (drop, flat bit, slope, flat run-out; not a ballpit landing unlike the one behind Haunted Castle)
Three tube slides
Ball pit
Soft play equipment, some of which is above the red drop slide run-out.

Adults (or should I say adult kids) can play on everything in here. This is what I went on:

Astra slide left to right once each. This is tamer than the outdoor Mega Slide, there’s no AIRtime.
Soft play
Blue double slide 8
Soft play
Red drop slide 8
Ball pit
Red drop slide 8

Summary of rides I went on:
The Beast 3
Thunder Falls Log Flume 3
Raging River Water Coasters straight 2 wavy 2
Viking Warrior Pirate Ship 2
TOTAL 12 RIDES

Plus the outdoor and indoor play areas I went on.

Returning To St Austell
I left Crealy around 5:10pm, having missed the last bus from there. However by walking to St Issey (2 miles away) I caught a bus to Bodmin, for connecting bus to St Austell. It gradually got dark between Bodmin and St Austell That seemed strange to me, because when I travelled this route the same time of day in July 2007 and June 2008, it was broad daylight. I finally reached St Austell around 7:20pm.

Monday Evening
This evening I had dinner at The Seven Stars Inn, where I enjoyed a delicious Homemade Steak and Ale Pie with new potatoes and vegetables, followed by apple pie and custard. Around 9pm I was back at my guest house and relaxed the rest of the evening.

Nemesis Nick

Day Three - Tuesday 29 September

Tuesday First Thing
Again, I awoke at 7am, but was able to have breakfast at the proper serving time today (8:30am), at a more relaxed pace. I had exactly the same as Monday.

Off to DairyLand
DairyLand is much easier to get to on public transport from St Austell than Cornwall’s Crealy. It’s close to Newquay on the St Austell to Newquay bus route. Half an hour’s journey time on one bus direct from St Austell to DairyLand. Thus I caught the 9:30 Newquay bus (an hour later than the Bodmin bus I caught Monday), yet still made it to DairyLand around 10am.

DairyLand Farm World
DairyLand is somewhat different to Cornwall’s Crealy or Flambards. If you want rides, you’ll be disappointed as there are none there. There’s lots to see and do though.

Cornish Heritage and Alternative Energy Centre
A farm museum, partly indoors and partly outdoors. Exhibits included a wide selection of old farm machinery, wagons and an upright piano. Part of the outdoor area is the Alternative Energy Centre, which included a solar panel. I take my time in museums, but looking back spending nearly three hours in here was a bit long.

Meeting Dazy
DairyLand have two costume characters: Boris the bull and Dazy the cow. I met Dazy when she appeared at midday, but Boris didn’t appear at all that day.

Hay Barn
Farm animals, including ponies, calves and pigs are on display here. I had a quick walk around here just before lunch. “Pat-A-Pet” takes place here under staff supervision certain times of the day, but I didn’t attend any of those sessions.

Lunch at Clarabelle’s Kitchen
I went to Clarabelle’s Kitchen for lunch: a Cornish pasty and a cup of coffee. You’ve got to have an oggy when you’re on holiday in Cornwall.

Aerial Ride
Two zip wires, much higher than the ones I went on at Cornwall’s Crealy the previous day. Under 7s aren’t allowed on these. Climb the steps to the high platform, sit on the seat, which hangs from a wire, and ride along the wire. Great fun! I did each slide twice: left slide, right slide, left slide, right slide.

Assault Course
Nearby are two identical assault courses (one colour coded red, the other colour coded blue), each consisting of two lines of obstacles, so two people can race each other. Each course consists of: Beam bridge (wooden beam hanging from metal bars by way of chains), wooden climbing structure (uphill slope, vertical other side), vertical barrels, assault net, crawl tube, hanging bars, crawl tube, see saw, stilts, horizontal barrels, balance beams (zigzag), vaulting gate and finally tyre steps. I timed myself at racing each course:
Red course 1 minute 57 seconds
Blue course 2 minutes 2 seconds

Near the assault course are two ladders to a high bridge. I climbed one ladder and crossed the bridge. A slide leads off it, and I went down the slide. After that I went up the other ladder (nearest the slide) and down the slide again. The ladders were much easier to climb than the ones on the drop tower at Funland Hayling Island 12 Sep 2009.

Clarabelle’s Bowgie
Clarabelle is a life sized fibreglass cow, and at set times, you can milk her under supervision of a member of staff. I had a go, being an imitation cow water rather than milk comes out, but it gives a feel for milking anyway. I was given a certificate afterwards. Next to Clarabelle’s Bowgie is a swing, and I went on it briefly.

Clarabelle’s Orbiter and Exhibitions
So far I’d Cornish Heritage, but there are other exhibitions. I briefly saw the Old Creamery, Old Granary and Recycling Exhibition. DairyLand has a working milking parlour: Clarabelle’s Orbiter. Milking takes place there daily, and was due to begin at 3:45pm. For now I had a look at the exhibits around the orbiter. Displays included milk advertising through the years and milk bottles with adverts printed on them (a common sight 1980s).

Cream Tea
Just after 3pm I returned to Clarabelle’s Kitchen for a Cornish cream tea. Got to have one of those when you’re on holiday in Cornwall. I found out the correct method is jam first with clotted cream on top in Cornwall.

The Old Timers
A shed displaying old tractors and an old combine harvester. Time was now going on, and I wanted to allow time to enjoy the Bull Pen, but I had a quick look around.

Milking Time at Clarabelle’s Orbiter
I was tempted to skip this, but since it was now so close to milking time, I decided to see the first few minutes. It was interesting watching the cows enter one by one, be fitted with the milking apparatus and each container fill with milk, whilst the orbiter spun around.

The Bull Pen
The time was around 4:10pm when I entered The Bull Pen. This indoor adventure playground by Taylor-Made Play features a four-lane Astra slide, a double drop slide which lands in a ball pit and a drop slide with two launch heights. There’s loads of soft play equipment too. Adults (or should I say adult kids?) are allowed to play on everything. However children under 6 are not allowed on the drop slides. This is what I went on in The Bull Pen:

Astra Slide all four lanes once each left to right (as viewed from the top)

Blue double drop slide: 4 goes.

Red drop slide: 4 goes from lower beam, 4 from upper beam.

Ground floor soft play equipment, working anticlockwise: Round pole > X-changer > Over and under barriers > Wringer rollers (horizontal rollers) > up Tumble Tower > down Zigzag Web Climber > six Spinning Discs.

Took the pull-up ramp to the first floor, to enjoy more soft play equipment. Working anticlockwise: Spinning poles (the closer you are to the pole the faster you spin, lean out and you go slower) > X-changer > Swing Over Nets > Slither Chicane > V-net bridge > (going round again) Spinning poles > X-changer > Swing Over Nets > down wavy tube slide > up ladder in back left corner > Slither chicane > Fireman’s pole.

After that I repeated some of the equipment, my memory is a bit thin on that but I definitely went up the padded steps in the back right corner and had a second go on the wavy tube slide.

Red drop slide: 8 from upper beam.

Before leaving I got someone to photograph me launching myself off the upper beam of the red drop slide, which necessitated one more go.

Altogether another mega fun indoor adventure play area. Not as big as Dragon Kingdom at Cornwall’s Crealy, let alone Adventure Zone at Devon’s Crealy or Sea Dragon’s Play City at Woodlands, but still great fun. Not sure whether this is larger or smaller than Swansea Playzone where I attended the adult night at the beginning of September last year, but that said, Swansea Playzone has soft play equipment above its red drop slide, which The Bull Pen at DairyLand doesn’t. Pity I didn’t allow myself longer in The Bull Pen. At least I enjoyed about 40 minutes of Taylor-Made fun in there to round off my visit. Also what a pity I didn’t have time to walk the two nature trails. Still at least I’ll have plenty of reasons to return to DairyLand on a future visit to Cornwall.

Returning To St Austell
DairyLand closed at 5pm, and just afterwards I caught the bus back to St Austell. Returning to St Austell from DairyLand was much faster than getting back from Cornwall’s Crealy the day before, about half an hour. This meant was able to relax in my room for over an hour before dinner, the only day I was able to do this.

Tuesday Evening
Around 7pm I went to The Rann Wartha (Wetherspoons), where it was Steak Club night. From the Steak Club menu, I chose Mixed Grill (standard size). A drink from the Steak Club selection was included, and for an additional fee I chose to add a dessert from the Steak Club menu: Belgian Waffle with chocolate sauce and ice cream. Once again a really delicious meal which I felt was excellent value for money. I must admit, I felt really tired there. The trip so far had been quite intense already (Carn Brea Leisure Centre Sunday afternoon, Cornwall’s Crealy Monday and DairyLand Tuesday). I’m amazed those of you who did “USA 2009: Stand Behind The Yellow Line” back in June could take two weeks of action at so many different parks. I got back to my room around 9pm, and went to bed earlier this evening, around 10:30pm.

Nemesis Nick

Day Four - Wednesday 30 September (My Birthday)

Wednesday First Thing
Day four was extra special in that it was my 38th birthday. The excitement began the moment I awoke at 7am. Since I was going to Flambards, I put on my RCCGB 20th Anniversary T-shirt. When I went to breakfast at 8:10am, an unexpected surprise was on the table: a birthday card for me from the staff of the guest house. Immediately I opened it, and the card my aunt had given me in advance. I had exactly the same continental breakfast as the day before.

Off To Flambards
Having finished breakfast around 8:40am, I set off for the railway station the other side of town. I enjoyed a relaxing train journey to Redruth, followed by bus ride to Flambards.

The Flambards Experience
Flambards claims to be “The best day of the week, whatever the weather”. Where better to spend my birthday than here? I arrived just before 11:00am and once admitted headed straight for The Big Ride Zone.

Hornet Coaster
As a RCCGB member, where better to start than the Hornet Coaster? Granted this family steelie is tame compared to Nemesis, PMBO and other giant steelies I’ve ridden elsewhere, but it’s still great fun. Three trains were running. Each train consists of two carriages, and each carriage has two compartments. Two persons can sit in a compartment, largest to the rear. I had four goes on this (front, front, back, third from front).

Balloon Race
Made by Zamperla. This consists of suspended balloons and baskets, which run clockwise at an angle. Flamingo Land has one exactly the same. Quite tame but still great fun, one could see it as a “rest ride”. For now I just had one go.

Monorail Cyclopter
Mini helicopters on a monorail, and you pedal around just like riding a bicycle. I had just one go (cyclopter 3 - white)

Log Flume
Another Zamperla ride. Your log leaves the platform, heads along the canal around a series of bends, past a sprinkler (an early attempt to get you wet), and up the lift hill to the top. Then the fun bit, downhill to land with a mighty splash, but I wore my cagoule and leggings. Finally two more bends and back to the station. There were six logs on today. I had four goes (log 6, then 3 different unmarked ones). Not sure which I find more thrilling: this or the one at Cornwall’s Crealy. The one at Cornwall’s Crealy has two rises and falls, whereas this has just one rise and fall.

Extreme Force
This is about the closest Flambards has to a white knuckle ride. Eight pairs of seats at the bottom of a vertical arm, which swings back and forth, up and over. As it goes over the top, you hang upside down high in the air. Hang time depends how well balanced the ride is. When perfectly balanced, hang time is terrifyingly long (that happened to me once on a previous visit, but thankfully not this time). Quite a hair-raising thrill ride, but not as scary as Rush at Thorpe Park. One go was enough on this for now (I was in seat 8 ), I don’t think I could take two straight off.

Chariot Race
A superbob ride which goes up and down, clockwise. I noticed the missing roof, that’s gone as it kept falling down. The ride looked strange without the roof, having seen it with one from 2002 to 2008. I sat in seat 22.

Chariot Race ran in rotation with Cornish Mine Train (next-door). I got the impression that train was really for children, so I didn’t bother asking if I could go on this. Near Thunderbolt, I noticed Carousel and Rock ‘n’ Tug were running in rotation. Rock ‘n’ Tug was running until 1pm, so thought I’d better do Rock ‘n’ Tug first. As it happened, I never got round to riding Carousel all day.

Rock ‘n’ Tug
Made by Zamperla, this differs from a swinging pirate ship in that it spins about its centre and swings simultaneously. Woodlands near Dartmouth also has one, as does Flamingo Land. I managed two goes, both in end rows for maximum thrill.

Thunderbolt
The other “near white knuckle” ride here. There are several sets of seats on the ends of spokes. The seat “spider” initially spins horizontally, rises to a tilted position (still spinning), and finally flips over as it spins. Sounds scary, but I fearlessly rode it without screaming. I quietly sang “Hard Rock Hallelujah” on this. Finally the spinning seat “spider” stops flipping over, returns to the horizontal position (still spinning), and finally slows down to a standstill. Fun but once was enough for me at a time! Afterwards I told the attendant once is OK but I daren’t ride it twice. He said it’s been slowed down, it used to be 4-speed, now it’s 3-speed, and they can no longer change its direction in the tilted position.

Hornet Coaster
Two more goes on this before lunch (second compartment, third compartment).

Lunch at Terrace Cafeteria
I went to the Terrace Cafeteria for my lunch: Cornish steak pasty with gravy, and a cup of coffee. When I sat down I put up my birthday cards, and got someone to take my picture at one point.

Weather Station
Next I went into the weather station, which includes displays about the weather, and water conservation. At the far end is a TV studio with blue wall, in which you can present a mock weather forecast. Two others entered and tried presenting a forecast, then I did the mock forecast on the wall.

World of Gus Honeybun
If you’re over 20 and from the south west may know Gus Honeybun. From 1961 to 1981 Westward TV held the ITV franchise for south west England, and certain times most days a Westward presenter read south west kiddies’ birthdays, whilst Gus did bunny hops or pressed magic buttons, as requested by the birthday kids. TSW kept Gus on when they held the franchise form 1982 to 1992. Unfortunately when Westcountry TV took over 1 January 1993 they didn’t want him, so since 1993 Gus Honeybun has been in a Portakabin at one end of Flambards, along with a load of Gus memorabilia. When I was a kid we could get Westward/TSW and HTV West where we lived. Sadly my family never sent in a birthday card for me when I was a kid. How appropriate then that I went into Gus Honeybun’s grotto on my 38th birthday. I got someone to photograph me holding up my birthday cards whilst standing next to Gus.

Shuttle
This is in the “Ferdi’s Funland” children’s rides area, however adults can go on this. The seats are in pairs, but only one adult per seat pair. Push the lever one way to go up, and the other way to go down. Hardly thrilling, but I still found it fun. I enjoyed two goes, both in seat 3.

Last year a ride attendant told me that Flambards bought the Carousel, Rock ‘n’ Tug, Shuttle, Rio Grande Train and Tonto Canoes from American Adventure when that closed down. Carousel, Rock ‘n’ Tug and Shuttle entered service at Flambards in 2007. Last year the Rio Grande Train entered service at Flambards under its new name Cornish Mine Train. The attendant said the Tonto Canoes were in storage at the time, and are unlikely to be put out. Did any members ride any or all these rides at their former location American Adventure?

Demon Drop Slide
A freefall drop slide, straight down and out. It has three launch heights: left beam (lowest), middle beam (middle height), right beam (highest). Sit on the beam and let yourself go. If you want AIRtime at Flambards, this is where you’ll get it in the form of a freefall drop. No safety harness like Oblivion at Alton Towers or Drop at Funland, just a thrilling freefall drop. There was a time when I was too nervous to do this, but on this occasion, I fearlessly let myself go from each beam. I enjoyed nine thrilling goes: left, middle, right, left, middle, right, left, middle, right.

To the right of the drop slide are two sloping metal slides like you see in your average park. Flambards call these the Chicken Slides. For completeness I had one go on each sloping metal slide. Finally I enjoyed one more go on each of the Demon Drop Slide beams again, left, middle, right.

There was now just half an hour left in which to enjoy the rides again in The Big Ride Zone before they all shut at 4pm, and I was determined to cram in as many as I could before then.

Thunderbolt
There were a few other riders on it besides me this time. They all left this afterwards just like me, no-one wanted a second go. Just goes to show, it’s not a ride you can do twice in succession.

Monorail Cyclopter
After the boisterous Thunderbolt, one go on the more restful Monorail Cyclopter. This time I sat in a red cyclopter.

Balloon Race
My second and final go on this for today, this time in basket number 8.

Extreme Force
Back to a near-white knuckle ride Extreme Force. This time I sat in seat 1.

Hornet Coaster
With ride closing time fast approaching, I was determined to have at least one more go on the Hornet Coaster, to end the day where I began. Amazingly I managed 4 goes (all front compartment) before it closed.

Summary of rides I went on:
Hornet Coaster 10
Balloon Race 2
Monorail Cyclopter 2
Log Flume 4
Extreme Force 2
Chariot Race
Rock ‘n’ Tug 2
Thunderbolt 2
Shuttle 2
TOTAL 27 RIDES

Summary of slides I went on:
Demon Drop Slide left beam 4, middle beam 4, right beam 4.
Chicken Slides left 1, right 1
TOTAL 14 SLIDES

Sadly the rides closed at 4pm, and the whole park shut at 4:30pm on this day. On all my previous visits in early July (early June last year) rides finished at 4.30pm and the park closed at 5pm.

Shiver Me Timbers
After my final go on Hornet Coaster, there was just time to walk around this network of funny bridges, designed and constructed by Taylor-Made Play. They once straddled a pool of water, but a few years ago that was drained, and the pool now contains gravel instead. The sprinklers are still working though. In order to do all the bridges, I had to cross some more than once. A bit of Taylor-Made fun to round off my visit.

After Closing Time
Having left at 4:30pm, I walked to Tesco, about half a mile away. My birthday fun wasn’t over yet, I wanted a celebratory dinner that evening. I was going to catch the bus back to Redruth, followed by train to St Austell, where I favoured going to recently opened Frankie & Benny’s for my birthday meal. However since I had a Ride Cornwall ticket (one day’s unlimited use of buses and trains in Cornwall), I now fancied catching a bus to Truro or even Penzance to eat there, and return to St Austell afterwards. Just before 5 o’clock a bus to Penzance turned up, so I got on, and saw more more of Cornwall, including St Michael’s Mount. I finally reached Penzance just after 6pm.

Birthday Dinner
I went to The Star Inn for my celebratory dinner. To make it extra special (compared to the meals I had the other nights) I fancied a starter as well as main course and dessert. Also I decided to have a pint of Cornish ale. This is what I had:
Starter: Potato skins with bacon and cheese
Main Course: Chicken New Yorker
Dessert: Indulgence Pudding with chocolate sauce and ice cream

When I sat down, I put my birthday cards on the table. The meal was really delicious, and a relaxing end to my birthday celebrations after a coaster crazy day at Flambards.

Rest of Wednesday
Just after eight I was at Penzance railway station, for the 20:16 train from Penzance to St Austell. I reached St Austell at quarter past nine, and my guest house about fifteen minutes later. Altogether, what a mega fun birthday I had, including a day at Flambards followed by a delicious three course meal at The Star Inn, Penzance. It was great to be celebrating my birthday “across the pond” (well, west of the Tamar) for once.

Nemesis Nick

Day Five - Thursday 1 October

Thursday First Thing
The final day of my holiday already. I woke up earlier than the previous days to give me time to pack before having breakfast just after eight.

Morning In Newquay
Being the day after my birthday, Thursday initially looked to be low key compared to Wednesday, added to which it was the last day of my holiday and the sixth anniversary of my grandmother’s funeral. Determined to make the most of it, I left the guest house just after 9am, and caught the next bus to Newquay. Once there I headed straight for Tolcarne Beach, which was quiet. Since the tide was way out, I was able to walk along the sand from Tolcarne Beach, across Great Western Beach and on to Towan Beach (not possible at high tide) where I made a sandcastle with my bare hands (one required element for a seaside trip). Having left Towan Beach next to Blue Reef Aquarium, I enjoyed a Cornish whippy ice cream (another seaside must-have) from a van. The ice cream seller said I was only the third person to buy an ice cream that day. Afterwards I headed into the town centre, and had a coffee and wrap at Prego Prego around midday before catching a bus to Hendra Holiday Park.

Oasis At Hendra
Hendra Holiday Park is on the outskirts of Newquay. One of its amenities, Oasis Funpool, is open to outside visitors. Oasis indoor pool has three water slides:

Aqua Whizz (red)
A narrow closed tube which must be descended in the lying position. It’s steep (but not vertical) and fast. You quickly spiral downwards anticlockwise and land in a catch tray.

Cruising Fun Slide (green)
A wide and gentle open slide. It spirals clockwise initially, then straightens and spirals anticlockwise the rest of the way to land in the landing pool.

Wet and Wild Superflume (blue)
One must sit on a tyre. This is fairly straight until you get to a u-bend, and double back around to land in a half way pool. There you drift across, on to another flume, around another bend and land in the landing pool.

The slides used to belong to a water slide complex in Newquay town centre, which closed 8 or 9 years ago, and became The Barracuda night club. The slides were removed and brought to Oasis. None of the slides have strobe lighting or sprinklers on them, which I feel is good, because, they're just unnecessary gimmicks! Oasis indoor pool also has:

Fun pool
This has a giant tap, and a lily pad you’re allowed to sit on. Unfortunately it doesn’t have a wave machine.

River rapids run
This is on from time to time. A siren is sounded when it is about to start.

Since it was quiet, I was allowed to stay in as long as I wanted, and was in the pool area approximately 1:20pm to 3:20pm. Altogether two hours of wet and wild fun. To make it easy to remember which slides I’d been on, I slid the red, green and blue slides in sequence round robin, thereby creating multiples of RGB. This is the order I enjoyed the facilities in the pool area:

Sliding: red, green, blue (in sequence eight times over)
Rapid River Ride
Fun pool (my only time of being in here, I briefly stood under the tap, and managed to sit on the lily pad at my third attempt for today)
Sliding: red, green, blue (in sequence ten times over)

Summary of slides I went on:
Aqua Whizz (red) 18
Cruising Fun Slide (green) 18
Wet and Wild Superflume (blue) 18
TOTAL 54 SLIDES

Back To St Austell
Just before 4pm caught the bus back to St Austell. Around 5pm I went to The Rann Wartha (Wetherspoons) for a Curry Club meal. I chose Chicken Tikka (standard). A drink from the Curry Club menu was included, and for a supplementary fee I added sticky toffee pudding with custard from the dessert selection on the Curry Club menu. A delicious meal to round off my holiday.

Train Journey Home
At ten past six I was back at the station ready for my booked train home, the 18:40 London Paddington train. In recent years I’ve become so used to travelling home from Cornwall on this particular train in June or July, when it’s been daylight most of the way home. Obviously this time it was dark most of the way home. I reached Bath Spa around 10pm, and home a few minutes later.

Nemesis Nick

Outtro

Highlights
Four nights’ B&B in St Austell, including the delicious continental breakfasts.
Evening meals at The Rann Wartha Wetherspoons (Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday) and Seven Stars Inn (Monday) in St Austell.
Achieving 72 lengths of the main pool and 40 goes on the water slide at Carn Brea Leisure Centre.
Riding The Beast, Thunder Falls Log Flume, Raging River Water Coasters and Viking Warrior Pirate Ship at Cornwall's Crealy.
Playing in the outdoor and indoor adventure play areas at Cornwall's Crealy and DairyLand.
Unexpectedly receiving a birthday card and chocolate truffle balls from the staff at my guest house Wednesday.
Celebrating my birthday at Flambards, followed by birthday dinner at The Star Inn, Penzance.
Enjoying 54 goes on three water slides in two hours at Oasis Funpool.

Lowlights
Flambards rides closing at 4pm, which is rather early really, (but at least I thus had time to go down to Penzance for a birthday dinner).

Summing Up
On the whole, a mega fun five day early autumn break. Over five days I thoroughly enjoyed one roller coaster, two log flumes, ten other rides, three indoor adventure play areas, four Astra slides, eight drop slides, fifteen dry tube slides, four water slides, two groups of funny bridges, five evening meals at three different pubs (three meals were Wetherspoons Club Night meals). It was certainly an action packed five day trip. The RCCGB USA trips are said to be intense, but I felt my five day trip was quite intense in itself. I was certainly tired when I got back. No way could I take a one week, let alone two week RCCGB USA trip even if I had the money and a passport.

The weather was quite good, it was sunny all day Sunday. Monday was mostly cloudy (with a little sunshine early afternoon), but at least it was mostly dry that day (bar a few odd spots of drizzle around 3pm at Crealy and light drizzle when I left the Seven Stars Monday evening). Tuesday was mostly cloudy but dry all day, with a sunny spell around 3ish. Wednesday was predominantly cloudy but dry day, though sunny spells were more generous (from mid afternoon it was mostly sunny till dusk). Finally Thursday started sunny, there was a shower as I left St Austell that morning, the sun was just out when I got to Newquay and got brighter whilst I was there. When I left Oasis, it was cloudy but dry, and remained so until I set off home in the evening.

Sorry I didn’t attend either day of the Loopathon the weekend following my trip to Cornwall. Nor will I be attending the ski trip in January. Most likely my next RCCGB trip will now be the 2010 Blackpool Bash next April. I’m really looking forward to that. Mark my words, the next six months will soon fly by.

smiler

My eyes are burning my eyes are burning Shocked

Rough Rider

Oh my God

I'm loosing the will to live!!!! Laughing

butler

I have lost the will to live.

c anderson

reading the reports has worn my eyes out and I have lost the will to live.

BAGuru

I'm sure that Nemme Nick is trying to go for the Booker Prize for the biggest gargantuan trip report ever !!!
And I've also lost the will to live Laughing

Death

No kidding here...But I've just done a byte-count of NN's entire trip report above, and it comes in at a whopping 56Kb exclusive of formatting! Surprised

For the non-technically minded; That's over 57,000 characters. From what I recall, the average Roald Dahl novel comes in at about 30,000...Meaning that NN's reports really are bigger than many published books. I only hope that none of the forum users are still on dial-up! Shocked

I might have a read of that report if ever I get the time...But for a report of this size, I may have to leave it until the next time I cross the Atlantic on a cargo ship. There should be just about enough there to keep me occupied for constant reading on three return trips... Laughing

Farewell for now, and NN: That's a great trip report...If only for the sheer detail and information contained within! Twisted Evil

>> Death <<

Happy Helen

A great report Nick.

I have spent many happy times down in Cornwall and I have done the train journey twice and it is lovely.

Death

Actually, I think I might've managed to hit on a useful solution to the length of NN's trip reports... Shocked

...See This RCCGB thread for more details! Very Happy

Nemesis Nick

Coaster Police

Ridiculous Mad

This is too much detail and boring as hell !!!!!

Skipped after first 2 paragraphs. Sorry, but it needs to be said.

Coaster Police

Steven Burns

Somebody make that man a moderator please!

bradpeet

Steven Burns

Nick have you thought of opening up a blog site? That way you could add all of the lavish detail you love to include and not annoy the users of this site who can`t stand posts of that size all over the forum. Then you could give more summerised posts and leave a link to the real report. That way your loyal readers could still enjoy your literature and save room on the forum.

https://www.blogger.com/start

coaster-andy

I think he should join other clubs mailing list and email it up there Laughing

Other than that shorten and put a link to full article on a blog site then if we wish to read we can click on it. Very good t may be but come on why is it so long.

Happy Helen

Death

Rogue

smiler

My eyes are still burning Laughing

mophead

Nick perhaps I could offer some advice on how to write a trip report that's interesting and informative with out going over the top:

1)When travelling to the park keep information brief for example. The journey to the park was good and I arrived shortley before opening time

2) When comparing rides to other rides try listing 1 similar. eg. The Thunderbolt coaster is nothing like it's mighty namesake at Kennywood but more along the lines of the Rattlesnake at Chessington.

3) Note the things you liked or didn't like a ride instead of listing the ride experience note for note - most people like the suprise of trying a new ride.

4) Don't get bogged down by small details. Nobody wants to know what boat you went in. eg. I enjoyed my ride on the log flume - the splash down was rather wet but luckily I had put my waterproofs on.

5) Keep to important facts about the park or attraction you visited- what you enjoyed or not. Don't write about things that have no relavance for others - such as how many lengths you swam or how long they were.

6) If you are riding a ride that most other people have ridden such as Nemisis then you only need write the fact you went on it and was there anything different from previous rides - we don't need a blow by blow account.

7) Don't write trip reports on trips you didn't go on

Cool

Don't believe everything other people tell you - if you appear over enthusiastic about something you might be told a porky pie.

And finally my eyes are burning more than smilers!

Nemesis Nick

mophead

I'm sure replying to this is going to be about as satisfying as banging my head against a wall (or a ride on Saw) but here goes:

nemesis scribe

Hmmmm Nice trip report . . . so what else did you do during your mega fun five day early autumn break? Wink

USfriends

I feel that a trip report should inspire a good memory, or
recall a funny story. To remind someone of a good time, or
inspire someone to do that trip themselves.

Not make you want to gouge your own eyes out.... Confused

Pete

c anderson

Nice comment Pete.

Rough Rider

I would love Nick to attend the USA trip in 2011 and then write a 10 page report just on how smooooooth the "RATTLER" is Laughing

Shouldn't be a problem??????????? HA! Laughing

Steven Burns

Okay i`m feeling bad for Nick now. Okay his reports are bad and too much to take in but he loves writing them and gets alot of pleasure from it. The great thing about this club is accepting people for there differences.

Nick, some people do like your reports. I just think you should move over to a blog site which would be yours and you could link everything to here. That way nobody would lose out on your trip reports. I know Vicci loves them. Just they seem to be winding to many people up, not that its fair to keep going at you for it.

Me and Vicci will look forward to seeing your blog site and still drop by and post normally mate.

I do think people should lay off him now, i think he has got it now.

Rogue

I agree fully with Steve. At the end of the day no one forces anyone to read other peoples posts on here. Nick is just enthusiastic about something he loves, we all show our enthusiasm in different ways....some by writing long trip reports, some by travelling miles to ride Go Gators....but each to their own.

I would just like everyone to keep in mind one of the terms and conditions of the board when posting:

RobinA

I agree with Steve and Bunnie that is a member wants to report in glorious details then why not. We all joined this club for the enjoyment of roller coasters and our trips out, and part of the enjoyment for some is recalling and writing a report of their time away from home.

IF, members are getting fed up with his detailed reports, then it there is a quite an easy answer, don't bother reading it. Hopefully all the comments are just a friendly jibe and secretly we are envious that we are unable to write such enthusiastic reports. Good luck to Nick, who I have never met, just carry on enjoying what you do - life is too short not to.

stevencaine

Can we start on Ryan again and the Rattler when will he give it rest i cant for the life of me see how he can like such a useless ride Cool

[url] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYF84b8O7a0 This ride will not still be standing when we go there in 2011 it needs burning down and a half decent ride putting in please Ryan give it a rest ive ridden it i know how bad it is Wink

[/url]

mophead

A deluded member writes....

Steven Burns

Spanners

Nick, do what you want to do, don't let anyone tell you what to write. So long as it is within the rules. I don't read all your posts, if I choose not to I have the ability to click another link.
Restriction of free speech I think.
Keep doing your long posts, you are who you are and some people do read your posts about ROLLER COASTERS and theme parks, that is what this site is for.

Keep up the good work Nick..

coaster-andy

Clare read both all the way through and said they were good me could not be bothered. Very Happy

admin

Many have made their feelings known about Nick's Reporting style but he's entitled to express himself how he sees fit. He's not breaking any rules, and will not be penalised for it.

If you feel that the report is too long, then the choice is your own whether you read it or not. We all know Nick likes to go into every detail, so if you see one of his reports and don't like the level of detail, don't click on the link.

We're sure Nick has read all posts that people have left and we leave it to him to decide whether he feels the input is valid, thats his choice.

The moderating team request that no further critique of Nicks reporting style take place.

Please continue to discuss his experiences of the parks and rides.

Thank You

Admin

Nemesis Nick

Nemesis Nick

I've now put up a load of photos for Ride Slide Go Cornwall 2009 on Flickr.

Here's a few that deserve direct links.

Truro rail station Spot the loose connection with a RCCGB event earlier this year.
Two photos of me outside the Haunted House at Cornwall's Crealy: this one and this one
Me in Bull Pen at DairyLand Farm World
Me on the Hornet Coaster at Flambards

Enjoy viewing the slide show.

coaster-andy

Great pics but enjoy Flambards for now as news around park while were there a few weeks ago was they had a bad season and is not looking good for future. I liked this park though but so far to travel just for the Hornet.

Nemesis Nick

Happy Helen

I have just had a look at your photos and it reminds me of the lovely times I have had in Cornwall, especially the ones of Flambards, a lot of the rides that are there now wern't there last time I went like the Thunderbolt, the Rocking Tug and the Space Shot ride in the American Adventure Section.

The Chariot Race Ride used to be called the Superbob and it used to have a tent round it, have they still got the Space Mission there ?

I went on the Hornet Coaster and I didn't think it was that good and the Log Flume. Also the Demon Drop Slide which has also got three levels, but only went down the lowest one, I saw you had been taking pictures of the signs and it was not reccommened to anyone who dosen't like height and the one you preteneding to be small enough to go in the Sea Legs Safari indoor play area, as I know you like those sort of things, the one at Crealy looked good, but one at Dairyland didn't look as big. It seemed to be mostly outdoors.

I belive the future is not going to be so good for Flambards as I know you asked if there was ever going to be a wooden coaster, but they probally couldn't afford it. I am quite tempted to go back to Flambards next time I am down in Cornwall to see how it has changed, it was nearly 20 years since I last went.

I also noticed a few pictures of you with the costumed cow at Dairyland, I know you are not the only one who likes having your picture taken with costumed charaters.

The photos of Newquay also reminded me of the happy times I have spent there. I reconised the pictures of the Island immediately. My sister and I went in the sea there when we were little.

Did you go in the Blue Reef Aquarium and round the shops in town, as I liked the Woolworths there, but it would have gone now.

Nemesis Nick

Happy Helen

Happy Helen